"I was checking out and thinking about how quick the young cashier
was when all of a sudden she opened my carton of eggs and
started fondling them!

She picked up every egg, one by one, and looked underneath each one.

I must have had some expression on my face because she quickly said,
"Oh, I always check everyone's eggs."

It took a little longer than i had wanted, but somehow, i didnt mind."


i'm coming back at Chistmas and buying the Chritmas glass *****
at that store.





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i dont care if its old, it still makes me laugh,
and the end changed as it should

--------------------

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

POLICE DEPARTMENT : Give us five minutes with the chicken and we'll find out.

RICHARD M. NIXON : The chicken did not cross the road. : I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road. : I don't know any chickens. : I've never known any chickens.

DR. SEUSS : Did the chicken cross the road? : Did he cross it with a toad? : Yes! the chicken crossed the road, : but why it crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY : To die, in the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING,JR. : I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads, without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA : In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE : It is the nature of chickens to cross the road;

KARL MARX : It was an historical inevitablity:

SADDAM HUSSEIN : This was an unprovoked act of rebellion.....we are quite justified in dropping nerve gas on it.

RONALD REGAN : What chicken? I don't remember any chicken

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK : To go boldly where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER : You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?

The Bible : and god came down from heavens and he said onto the chicken, "Thou shall cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

FREUD : The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity

BILL GATES : I have just released chicken coop 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your importain do***ents, and balance your check book; and explorer is an inextricable part of the chicken coop 98 operating system.

EINSTEIN : Did the chicken really cross the road---------or, did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON : I did NOT cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? : Could you define crossing please?

G. BUSH: I am concerned about this event of chickens crossing roads.

COLONEL SANDERS : I missed one????

URANUS: The chicken crossed the road because the chicken on the other side had an unfair amount of feed that should be shared.


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Aw c'mon bcop you gotta admit the last line is pretty funny, si?

Now please indulge us with the reasons it's not.

Thank you
G.A.R.Y.