darwin awards!
#1
03-29-2005, 01:24 PM
darwin awards!
Darwin Awards...And I think we just may have a winner...!
The following attempt at a crime spree in Washington State appeared to be the robber's first (and last), due to his lack of a previous record of violence, and his terminally stupid choices:
1. His target was H&J Leather & Firearms, a gun shop specializing in handguns.
2. The shop was full of customers - firearms customers.
3. To enter the shop, the robber had to step around a marked police car parked at the front door.
4. A uniformed officer was standing at the counter, having coffee before work.
Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up, and fired a few wild shots from a .22 target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, the police officer with a 9mm Glock 17, the clerk with a .50 Desert Eagle, assisted by several customers who also drew their guns, several of whom also fired.
The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons.
No one else was hurt in the exchange of fire.
The following attempt at a crime spree in Washington State appeared to be the robber's first (and last), due to his lack of a previous record of violence, and his terminally stupid choices:
1. His target was H&J Leather & Firearms, a gun shop specializing in handguns.
2. The shop was full of customers - firearms customers.
3. To enter the shop, the robber had to step around a marked police car parked at the front door.
4. A uniformed officer was standing at the counter, having coffee before work.
Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up, and fired a few wild shots from a .22 target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, the police officer with a 9mm Glock 17, the clerk with a .50 Desert Eagle, assisted by several customers who also drew their guns, several of whom also fired.
The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons.
No one else was hurt in the exchange of fire.
#3
03-09-2007, 08:56 PM
RE: darwin awards!
For those who don't know what the Darwin Awards are here is a previous post of mine in another forum>
2006 Darwin Awards, Runner-Ups, and Honorable Mentions
[hr]
MICHIGAN...
In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.
CALIFORNIA...
A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who "totally zoned when he ran," -- accidentally jogged off a 100-foot-high cliff on his daily run.
NORTH CAROLINA...
Buxton, NC: A man died on a beach when an 8-foot-deep hole he had dug into the sand caved in as he sat inside it. Beach-goers said Daniel Jones, 21, dug the hole for fun, or protection from the wind, and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom Thursday afternoon when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand.
People on the beach on the outer banks, used their hands and shovels, trying to claw their way to Jones, a resident of Woodbridge, VA, but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him while about 200 people looked on. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.
CALIFORNIA...
Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed in Lompoc, CA, as he fell face-first through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth(to keep his hands free) rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.
DELAWARE...
Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed in Selbyvill, Del, as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.
HONOURABLE MENTION:
NEW JERSEY...
Paul Stiller, 47, was hospitalized in Andover township, NJ, and his wife Bonnie was also injured, when a quarter-stick of dynamite blew up in their car. While driving around 2 AM, the bored couple lit the dynamite and tried to toss it out the window to see what would happen, but apparently failed to notice the window was closed.
RUNNER UP:
WASHINGTON...
TACOMA, WA.........Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from the Tacoma Narrows Bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM.
Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay nearby. One end of the cable was secured around Bingham's leg and the other end was tied to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy river water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. "All I can say" said Bingham, "is that God was watching out for me on that night. There's just no other explanation for it."
Bingham's foot was never located.
AND THE WINNER: FROM G-E-R-M-A-N-Y is....
Overzealous zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn, Germany) fed his constipated elephant Stefan 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally let it fly, and suffocated the keeper under 200 pounds of poop!
Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded on him. "The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground, where he struck his head on a rock and lay unconscious as the elephant continued to evacuate his bowels on top of him" said flabbergasted Paderborn police detective Erik Dern. "With no one there to help him, he lay under all that dung for at least an hour before a watchman came along, and during that time he suffocated."
2006 Darwin Awards, Runner-Ups, and Honorable Mentions
[hr]
MICHIGAN...
In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.
CALIFORNIA...
A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who "totally zoned when he ran," -- accidentally jogged off a 100-foot-high cliff on his daily run.
NORTH CAROLINA...
Buxton, NC: A man died on a beach when an 8-foot-deep hole he had dug into the sand caved in as he sat inside it. Beach-goers said Daniel Jones, 21, dug the hole for fun, or protection from the wind, and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom Thursday afternoon when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand.
People on the beach on the outer banks, used their hands and shovels, trying to claw their way to Jones, a resident of Woodbridge, VA, but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him while about 200 people looked on. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.
CALIFORNIA...
Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed in Lompoc, CA, as he fell face-first through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth(to keep his hands free) rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.
DELAWARE...
Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed in Selbyvill, Del, as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.
HONOURABLE MENTION:
NEW JERSEY...
Paul Stiller, 47, was hospitalized in Andover township, NJ, and his wife Bonnie was also injured, when a quarter-stick of dynamite blew up in their car. While driving around 2 AM, the bored couple lit the dynamite and tried to toss it out the window to see what would happen, but apparently failed to notice the window was closed.
RUNNER UP:
WASHINGTON...
TACOMA, WA.........Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from the Tacoma Narrows Bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM.
Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay nearby. One end of the cable was secured around Bingham's leg and the other end was tied to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy river water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. "All I can say" said Bingham, "is that God was watching out for me on that night. There's just no other explanation for it."
Bingham's foot was never located.
AND THE WINNER: FROM G-E-R-M-A-N-Y is....
Overzealous zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn, Germany) fed his constipated elephant Stefan 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally let it fly, and suffocated the keeper under 200 pounds of poop!
Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded on him. "The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground, where he struck his head on a rock and lay unconscious as the elephant continued to evacuate his bowels on top of him" said flabbergasted Paderborn police detective Erik Dern. "With no one there to help him, he lay under all that dung for at least an hour before a watchman came along, and during that time he suffocated."
#6
04-25-2007, 06:16 PM
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Canfield, Ohio (halfway between Cleveland and Pittsburgh)
Posts: 291
RE: darwin awards!
People are not this stupid right?
Suspect Tries to Trade Jeep at Place of Theft[/align] AP[/align] NORWALK, Conn. (April 24)- A Bridgeport man has been arrested after he tried to trade in a Jeep to a car dealer, a month after allegedly stealing the same Jeep from that same dealer, police said.
Jazrahel King, 29, was arrested Saturday after a sales manager at Wholesalers of America recognized King's 2003 black Jeep Liberty as a vehicle that was stolen from his lot in early March.
The sales manager, Diego Coleman, said King brought the sport utility vehicle in, hoping to trade up for a larger vehicle.
"I was left speechless. I couldn't believe that he would try to take back another car and he didn't think we would recognize him," Coleman said Monday.
King had come to the dealership last month to test-drive some vehicles, Coleman said. But there was a problem with King's credit, so salesmen at the dealership scrubbed the test-drives.
Coleman said he last saw King wandering around the lot as he was preparing the Jeep for a man who had just bought it. The keys were left in the Jeep.
Then the Jeep and King disappeared, Coleman said.
When police inspected King's Jeep Saturday, they found that the key ring was the same as those issued by Wholesalers of America.
The temporary plate on the vehicle belonged to the dealership and do***ents found inside showed it belonged to the dealership, Sgt. Ronald Pine said.
[/align][/align]
Suspect Tries to Trade Jeep at Place of Theft[/align] AP[/align] NORWALK, Conn. (April 24)- A Bridgeport man has been arrested after he tried to trade in a Jeep to a car dealer, a month after allegedly stealing the same Jeep from that same dealer, police said.
Jazrahel King, 29, was arrested Saturday after a sales manager at Wholesalers of America recognized King's 2003 black Jeep Liberty as a vehicle that was stolen from his lot in early March.
The sales manager, Diego Coleman, said King brought the sport utility vehicle in, hoping to trade up for a larger vehicle.
"I was left speechless. I couldn't believe that he would try to take back another car and he didn't think we would recognize him," Coleman said Monday.
King had come to the dealership last month to test-drive some vehicles, Coleman said. But there was a problem with King's credit, so salesmen at the dealership scrubbed the test-drives.
Coleman said he last saw King wandering around the lot as he was preparing the Jeep for a man who had just bought it. The keys were left in the Jeep.
Then the Jeep and King disappeared, Coleman said.
When police inspected King's Jeep Saturday, they found that the key ring was the same as those issued by Wholesalers of America.
The temporary plate on the vehicle belonged to the dealership and do***ents found inside showed it belonged to the dealership, Sgt. Ronald Pine said.
[/align][/align]
#7
04-25-2007, 08:01 PM
RE: darwin awards!
Darwin/protect our borders?
1996 -- On May 23, the bodies of two Dominican Republic nationals were discovered, one near JFK Airport in Long Beach, N.Y., and the other about 10 miles from Miami (Fla.) International Airport. Both had grease marks, and after investigations, police in both places said they believed the men had fallen from the wheel wells of airliners, where they had stowed away hoping for illegal entry into the United States.
1996 -- On May 23, the bodies of two Dominican Republic nationals were discovered, one near JFK Airport in Long Beach, N.Y., and the other about 10 miles from Miami (Fla.) International Airport. Both had grease marks, and after investigations, police in both places said they believed the men had fallen from the wheel wells of airliners, where they had stowed away hoping for illegal entry into the United States.
#8
04-25-2007, 08:09 PM
RE: darwin awards!
1995 -- In May, Dorothy Diane Rose, who is in a halfway house in Tampa, Fla., the result of a 1990 trial in which she was found not guilty by reason of insanity for strangling her two toddlers, petitioned her judge in Tampa to be released because she has a job lined up. According to a counselor, a local couple wants to hire her as a baby sitter.
#9
04-25-2007, 08:11 PM
RE: darwin awards!
Praise the Lord
1996 -- Florida state Rep. Marvin Couch, R-Oviedo, resigned in February, a week after he was arrested on three misdemeanor sex charges. He was caught by police in his car in a shopping center parking lot at noontime receiving oral sex from a prostitute. Rep. Couch was a member of a legislators' prayer-meeting group that called itself the God Squad.
1996 -- Florida state Rep. Marvin Couch, R-Oviedo, resigned in February, a week after he was arrested on three misdemeanor sex charges. He was caught by police in his car in a shopping center parking lot at noontime receiving oral sex from a prostitute. Rep. Couch was a member of a legislators' prayer-meeting group that called itself the God Squad.
#10
04-25-2007, 08:17 PM
RE: darwin awards!
Another one for the ladies
1996 -- Featured at the Donn Roll Contemporary museum in Sarasota, Fla., in May and June was Charon Luebbers' Menstrual Hut, a 6-by-6-by-5-foot isolation booth to symbolize the loneliness that society has forced upon menstruating women. Accompanying it were 28 paintings created by Luebbers' pressing her face into whatever discharge was present in each of the 28 days of her cycle one month, to show the contrast.
1996 -- Featured at the Donn Roll Contemporary museum in Sarasota, Fla., in May and June was Charon Luebbers' Menstrual Hut, a 6-by-6-by-5-foot isolation booth to symbolize the loneliness that society has forced upon menstruating women. Accompanying it were 28 paintings created by Luebbers' pressing her face into whatever discharge was present in each of the 28 days of her cycle one month, to show the contrast.
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