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THE CHICKEN FARMER

A woman walks into an accountant's office and tells him that
she needs to file her taxes.

The accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a
few questions." He gets her name, address, social security
number, etc. and then asks, "what is your occupation?"

"I'm a *****," she says.

The accountant is somewhat taken back and says,
"No, No, No, that won't work. Let's try to rephrase that"

The woman says, "OK, I'm a high-end call girl".

"No, that still won't work. Try again."

They both think for a minute; then the woman says,
"I'm an elite chicken farmer."

The accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with
being a prostitute?"

"Well, I raised a thousand little peckers last year"


"Chicken Farmer it is."




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A man takes a balloon ride at a local country fair. A fierce wind suddenly kicks up, causing the balloon to violently leave the fair and carry its occupant out into the countryside. Landing in a farmer's field, the man is left with no clue how far he has flown or to where. Seeing a man walking down the street, he cries out: "Excuse me, sir, can you tell me where I am?" Eyeing the man in the balloon the passer by says: "You are in a downed balloon in a farmer's field." "You must be an accountant, sir," replied the balloon's unhappy resident. "How could you possible know that?" asked the passer-by. "Because what you have told me is absolutely correct, but of absolutely no use to me now, " answered the balloonist.
The accountant says "You must be a manager." The balloonist says "How would you know that?" The accountant replies, "Because you don't know where you are, you don't know where you're going, and you are exactly where you were 20 minutes ago before i met you but somehow it's now my fault!"




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